Boxer_Daddy's blog

BOXING RANT XVI: Message Ahead!

“Hey man, I just got in town. Let’s fight!”
“What’s up stud? I’m glad to see you’re in town, but I’m busy. If you had messaged ahead of time, we could’ve done something. I’ve got OTHER plans tonight.”

I’M BACK for 2021 BOXERS! With a Fresh RANT!

Okay, so this just happened to me recently, but I’m told this happens to most of my fighting brethren in California. A guy comes into town and hits you up out of the blue wanting to fight. UHM… RUDE MUCH! How do you just show up without contacting the person you want to fight ahead of time? Is that person not human? They’re not your personal tool to summon like a mystical object. Did you not think that maybe they might have a life just like you? That perhaps they have a job, plans and other obligations other than your personal gratification. Given the difficultly and the specifics that need to be worked out for two guys to meet up and engage in fisticuffs; wouldn’t it be wise to “phone” or “text” ahead and let the other guy know you’re coming? I mean, call me crazy for being a considerate logical thinking person, but shouldn’t you arrange the specifics beforehand so the experience is much better for both of you?

Okay readers, let me hear from you. I’d love to hear you and your experience(s) with this.

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Last edited on 11/19/2021 6:14 AM by Boxer Daddy
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Comments

15

flydog75 (0) 12 days ago

You are right, daily life is very hectic and often it becomes difficult to respect the commitments made some time before ..... It is impossible to organize something suddenly!!

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surrey71 (24 ) 12 days ago

The vast majority of us have busy lives, we don’t just live to wrestle/box/fight!
Unfortunately it’s happened to me “I’m free, let’s wrestle!” I can’t drop everything so I have to say “with some notice I could’ve set something”.
Even worse is when you set something up and then you get a no show or a last minute text saying they can’t meet.
We are humans not toys, but unfortunately some members do treat us as such!

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ruffnhard (80) 12 days ago

I see this way too often, and it appears in the Match Requests section a lot, "match wanted for tonight"
I've noticed that most who do this are guys who have been here for years and have zero past opponents!
My theory is they put out a last minute message to meet knowing it's highly unlikely you'll be free "now"... they feel like they are being active and get to complain that nobody on this site meets!

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blackboxer (3 ) 12 days ago

This happens so often because I have access to a ring. The worst part is when they either flake or don’t want to help cover the ring cost to use it… last minute

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BOXERMAN (39) 12 days ago

Hear, hear. I contend the best fights really come from a gym where you KNOW someone is serious or word of mouth.
And the point about zero past opponents really rings true.

DO you men find that most of the mouthiest guys usually have NO past opponents?

I have come to look at this site as a great social gathering, virtual bar where we meet, greet and with friends or potential opponents (or not).

And, its free, ive met more international boxing men and overall, I like it.

Bob

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Boxer Daddy (46) 12 days ago

Much Love for the comments guys, it's nice to know I'm not alone in this. The last minus fight requests Irk me primarily because the traveler knew WAY in advance he'd be near you. Ever heard of those communication devices called phones, they do a great many things. I have access to a ring as well, but I still need to let the gym owner know I'll be using the place in advance. Sometimes Rappers or Singers rent the gym out for videos.
Regardless it's plain etiquette to notify in advance. It won't kill you and will make sure your best laid plans come to fruition.

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SeattleFight (379) 12 days ago

Agree. That’s why I typically try to arrange things in advance whenever possible, but I am often met with “dunno, msg me when you get here.” Then it often happens that the putz then says “Why didn’t you let me know sooner?” GRRRRR. There’s always a better chance it will work out when it’s set in advance. True, sometimes spontaneous matches can happen and they’re awesome, but you can’t *expect* someone to be available immediately without notice. My philosophy is it never hurts to ask - politely.

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KOFistBoxer (1) 12 days ago

You are absolutely right. I totally agree. This has happened to me several times before.

I think some people have been so conditioned to feel entitled to immediate gratification all the time, by their ability to access so much so quickly on the phone, that they think meeting another person for a fight should land somewhere between ordering a pizza and calling up an escort service. To the point where if you don't give them what they want right away, they start accusing you of all sorts of things.

Ruffnhard made a good point as well. Think he is on to something. They get the chance to beat their chest from behind the safety of their computer screen about how someone backed down, when deep down they really know there was no real chance of them needing to back it up.

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Boxer Daddy (46) 11 days ago

(In reply to this)

GREAT Point KOFistBoxer,

I feel like today's Instant Gratification society feels everything is on Demand. Heaven forbid you should have actually have to plan ahead for something. If they want the accolades of instant fame they'll have to do the sustained work. Good Luck to them trying to find someone wanting to fight or vouch for them with 0 Fight Recommendations.

I'll be looking you up when I'm in Chicago over Memorial Day weekend. Train hard my friend and I'll of course Notify you in Advance.

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BigScorpio55 (3 ) 12 days ago

What's worse is that it happens locally. I had arranged to take time off from work to meet the opponent at my place. Come time to meet, i don't hear anything from them. Plus I think the scene here is racist AF which explains why there aren't many past opponents on my profile and also here is cliquish because I'm not a certain build, have certain looks, etc So I have better luck meeting outside my area, though I am trying to get back into the swing of things now that Covid restrictions have eased, but still expensive to travel. It beats my local scene by leaps and bounds.

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Boxer Daddy (46) 11 days ago

(In reply to this)

Truly sorry to hear that BigScorpio. I'm in a major metropolitan area so I don't have that problem. But I've heard many things about California. However, I DO know of a legit Boxer in Fresno that would be more than happy to Box you. Yeah, it's 3 hours by car... but definitively better than nothing.

Keep your guard up and come out punching.

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Pummeled (1) 11 days ago

I don't think it's an issue for someone to see who's available in the moment, unless they're specifically demanding you meet them. A simple "Sorry, I'm not free" is enough.

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Boxer Daddy (46) 10 days ago

(In reply to this)

Pummeled, it's simple etiquette and common courtesy to notify your opponent in advance. Given the rarity of meetings between fighters. No one wants to miss an opportunity to fight the person they've been chatting with for months because the guy didn't have the decency to reach out before he arrived in town. Not sure what kind of "laissez faire" life you're leading but I have a life with a schedule. If my friends don't call ahead then we're not hanging.

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Pummeled (1) 10 days ago

(In reply to this)

that's pretty intense

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Boxer Daddy (46) 10 days ago

(In reply to this)

The motto of the fraternity I belong to is "Prior Planning Prevents Piss Poor Performance."

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