Do you have to be rude?

punch (7)

8/27/2022 10:01 PM

So I just noticed that I am blocked by another commenter here (besides the one who did it 11 days ago after our exchange below), figured out who it is and why.

His only prior interaction with me was his four comments to one of my own forum posts - no private messages between us at all - so it is really amusing seeing this pot calling the kettle black now trying to appear wise by waxing lyrical about not getting triggered, claiming to "only blocked a couple of times, when someone wouldn't leave me alone" and be "pretty hard to offend" lol!

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BJJWrestlerLasVegas (9)

24 days ago

(In reply to this)

The block is way overused by many here. It gives some a sense of power. If done by mistake it is difficult to correct as the blocker must be contacted indirectly (public post? by asking another to intercede?) Some use it administratively to keep track of those they do not wish to recontact in error (odd use but I understand) just a some of us may use the "follow" to remind us to contact someone when we have a chance. I see the height of rudeness be ignoring common Internet courtesy of replying to a message. This is especially to those who have listed a city to which they are visiting. After all, why add another city if u have no intention of meeting anyone there?

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punch (7)

24 days ago

(In reply to this)

Not only is it neither a rule nor internet courtesy, but also it is self-entitled to expect that just because a person chooses to initiate a message then others must reply (no reply is a reply in itself so just move on) and "height of rudeness" is definitely way exaggerated - an outright insult already exceeds that easily.

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AgentPoseidon (20)

23 days ago

(In reply to this)

No, ignoring compliments and interest is the definition of rudeness and because you disagree with that proves you dont even know what manners are let alone having any. But we see that with how you have troll parties in public, butthurt because you were blocked waaaahhhh.

Save the drama for your no manners mama.

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punch (7)

23 days ago

(In reply to this)

Firstly, anyone who scrolls down below can see that the only drama mama around here is you, crying like a little baby girl ("waaaahhhh" indeed) with your long-ass entire essay of a whiny rant about how butthurt you were over being ignored by others.

Secondly, they probably did that precisely because they didn't want to have to deal with your missing intelligence: for the umpteenth time (even though your pea brain is unlikely to comprehend) - your blocking does absolutely nothing to me, especially since you're actually still checking out my comments to reply, and also as at least two people have mentioned it is just your feeble attempt at making yourself feel as if you have some semblance of power.

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BJJWrestlerLasVegas (9)

22 days ago

(In reply to this)

Usually people check out comments as they are notified that a comment has been made. The notification does not give the actual comment, thus one must check it out to see what was written.

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punch (7)

21 days ago

(In reply to this)

However, the notification actually shows not only who made the comment but also whether it is a (new) comment or instead a reply (to what the notified person himself had previously commented). Therefore, blocking someone but yet being unable to resist checking out to see what new stuff he has written and even choosing to respond to it totally defeats that purpose of blocking.

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AgentPoseidon (20)

17 days ago

(In reply to this)

Wow punch sure is obsessed with blocking. Isn't he? Waaaahhhh.

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AgentPoseidon (20)

25 days ago

(In reply to this)

Awww that really triggers you doesn't it? Go get a job and a life dude.

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punch (7)

24 days ago

(In reply to this)

Aww look who's back again to prove how he's truly a pot calling the kettle black? Poor lil "everybody hates me" who has no job, no life, and blocks whenever he gets triggered lol!

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GrizzlyWrestler16 (1 )

8/27/2022 7:49 PM

And I will say this. It costs ZERO CENTS to be a decent human being. If you are not interested in someone(whether it’s cyber or otherwise), then say something, tell them that you hope they find luck in finding what they are looking for and move on. If the person is continuing to be rude to you, especially in the main chat, then report them and block them and move on.

Everyday in the main chat, there is at least one person causing drama and they feel the need to drag everyone in the chat in on it. Or a person is going around telling other people to “not talk to them” on main for one reason or another. It’s tiring. There are simple solutions to make your time on the site worthwhile. And if after a while, you can’t deal with it anymore, then just get off the site. I hate for anyone to leave over drama, but hey. In this day and age, you got to protect your peace of mind.

This site will not last forever. There will always be other sites to use and go on, and there will be new sites made that will make this site obsolete. And who knows, maybe those sites will be better than this. But for now, let’s just all try to be decent people.

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TakeThePunchesAI (7)

8/27/2022 8:31 PM

(In reply to this)

Well said man.

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GrizzlyWrestler16 (1 )

8/27/2022 7:38 PM

I will say this. I have been in the chat so many times now. I have seen the fair amount of drama that goes on in the chat. I have also dealt with a situation in a Private chat where a dude who is 21 was railing into me, trying to provoke a response back(in which I didn’t give to him). He ultimately blocked me.

I think one of the main problems with the chat is the fact that the Admin doesn’t do enough to punish those that are consistently disrespectful to people. I get that they can’t do anything about private chat messages, but that needs to change. Especially if the person has it on their record that they have been rude to others. And especially if the person is harassing or stalking or threatening someone because they didn’t get their way.

The admin let too many people in the main chat be keyboard warriors and they get off with nothing but a slap on the wrist, but for others like me, they bring down the ban hammer.

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PUNCHED AND PINNED (0)

8/27/2022 3:38 AM

All I can say is,,, people need to "Build a bridge,,get over it"

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slimp (0)

8/22/2022 4:33 AM

I think some block because it's one of the few things that gives them a perception of personal power. I've also figured out that some guys have multiple profiles, so if you find yourself blocked by someone with whom you've had little to no interaction, it may be because you've offended another one of their identities. Engaging with such neurotic people is a no win proposition anyway. It's pitiable that they are remarkably transparent to everyone but themselves.

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BJJWrestlerLasVegas (9)

8/21/2022 4:41 AM

S many on chat tonight did not even have the courtesy to reply, even to say they are busy or not interested, the height of rudeness!

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slimp (0)

8/17/2022 4:44 AM

So, person A is offended by something person B said, although person B intended no offense. Then person B becomes offended because person A chose to be offended. Then sniping and or blocking ensues, and carries on for who knows how long. Q: Why does this happen? A: Insecurity. Confident people aren't so easily triggered, and are more likely to ask for clarification of comments that can be taken in more than one way.

Some are well and truly addicted to drama and lust after reasons to be offended. Confident people don't get sucked into such drama queens bullshit. It's best to let such people remain center stage in their own empty theatre.

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BigMG (1 )

8/16/2022 11:53 AM

I've found you just need to talk about wrestling first and share that before you go on to passing personal comments.

I once got chatting to a guy who just did body splashes and nothing else in wrestling.

When I asked if he did any other moves he blocked me - so you just never know!

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john el (14)

8/17/2022 7:36 PM

(In reply to this)

That's weird, this block fetish people seem to have.
Granted, I will call out people for boundaries - Good example is being called "daddy" right there in my profile, don't do it. "Please don't call me that, it's squicky and in my profile even".
Rather then oh, sorry and move along, they justify, "oh its just a word, dont be so sensitive". Yeah I'll block that, you dont know me and why that bothers me. If I do the same, I simply apologize and move on.

Can't imagine blocking because someone asks if I do another move. Like, "no, that's all I like or, yes I do xxx".

I haven't seen this as much here though, as on other social media.

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punch (7)

8/17/2022 8:08 PM

(In reply to this)

Just throwing it out there (as a guess cos obviously I wouldn't know for sure), maybe it was also in their profile and so they chose not to wait for a "justification" nor deal with anyone who didn't bother to read?

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BamaJDon41 (7 )

8/17/2022 8:00 PM

(In reply to this)

It's amazing how easy it is to get blocked here. I've been blocked by people I've never spoken to. Apparently they didn't like some comment I wrote on a blog. Whatever. On fb I've blocked dozens of people because if I respond to them with the language they use, then I'm the one that gets suspended. Here, haven't blocked anyone.

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surrey71 (24 )

8/21/2022 11:38 AM

(In reply to this)

Some guys have blocked me because of an old blog I wrote about too many people calling wrestling a “homoerotic sport”… not everyone gets into an erotic game - pure wrestling is a sport.
But I got blocked because I dared to be different from their view!

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punch (7)

8/17/2022 8:44 PM

(In reply to this)

Same haven't blocked anyone, if I ever do here it'll probably be to stop them after they've harassed me with direct messages but yeah after what happened below (lol) it did occur to me that maybe their reason is to just prevent knowing anything more about them.

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TakeThePunchesAI (7)

8/17/2022 8:32 PM

(In reply to this)

Yeah, now that I've been on here some time, I've gotten used to it. Before I quit the chat on here which apparently hated me, I was very social on there. There's one dude I enjoyed speaking with, but I stopped seeing his stuff so I was confused, so I asked on the chat because he very greeted me. Somebody messaged me and told me that he blocked me because he didn't like my personality. I was told it's nothing personal.

It's tricky for sure.

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slimp (0)

8/18/2022 4:54 AM

(In reply to this)

"...he blocked me because he didn't like my personality. I was told it's nothing personal." Hilarious! The guy tried to take the "personal" out of personality. Hopefully, he's not passing on his DNA.

I've only blocked a couple of times, when someone wouldn't leave me alone. If I've been blocked, I've never noticed. Hopefully, I've not offended anyone. I think I'm pretty hard to offend. When people try, I just take it as trash talk foreplay.

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TakeThePunchesAI (7)

8/21/2022 1:47 PM

(In reply to this)

I missed this response, my bad. I mean it's not big deal man. I'm a high energy and outgoing guy so that don't necessarily rub people the right way you know. That's life. I don't do the chat anymore so I don't worry about it anymore, but being on there tells you a lot about some of the people on here.

Yeah I had... the dude I had my very first match on here when I joined. He kept insisting and insisting, so I met with him. It was a fun first experience. But I told him, I don't like doing the same thing twice. I like variety and doing different things and I like fun and intensity, stuff I say all the time. But he kept coming back about a match, and I kept telling him I don't want to do things the same way. At this point I wanted to do matches in the ring, I don't like the meeting at peoples house thing (let that be known by the way...). Plus, he was physically limited, so I couldn't do what I wanted to do, like I'm a young guy you know. Anyway, he started getting real like aggressively desperate. So I started to get irritated because I've been nothing but nice and I told him he was on the verge of being blocked, but he decided to block me instead, lol.

That's another thing. I don't know if it fits in this category, I don't like clingy mentality. That kind of energy will get you blocked by me, I don't know how you guys feel about that. But very naturally, I avoid meeting with people more than once. There's a lot of people on here, and a lot of different styles. Given I'm into pro style, personalities matter, I build my scenarios based of personalities and builds and stuff. That's what makes it fun. It's not going to be fun if I just meet with the same person all the time. Like who just goes to the one restaurant all the time? Like just that one. Now for this looking for relationships on here, that makes sense. There's only one person I've met with more than once, and that was gut check (he's really fun for you jobbers out there), and that was a year apart.

I brought that up because I do think that's a rude trait some people have unknowingly. And I think that can get a lot of people blocked.

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Conqueror (1 )

8/16/2022 11:55 AM

(In reply to this)

Oh well u do learn new things everyday

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Conqueror (1 )

8/16/2022 8:51 AM

So I’ve had a thing this morning.
Guy posted a singlet pic in a group here this morning (would be late at night where he is). I said nice singlet shame we can’t see the whole of it. He msged me the whole picture. I said nice u would eat my for dinner. He said wow really? I said yes as you are quite a big guy.
He thinks my comment is body shaming and has blocked me.
Your thoughts 💭

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punch (7)

8/16/2022 9:02 AM

(In reply to this)

I'd have expected "big guy" to be taken as a compliment. Did he say/ tell you that he thinks your comment is body shaming though?

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Conqueror (1 )

8/16/2022 9:19 AM

(In reply to this)

No he blocked me! Which I thought was hilarious. I did ask him

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punch (7)

8/16/2022 10:19 AM

(In reply to this)

But did he reply or tell you why (can't see your attached photo - it's shown as not classified yet)? If he didn't say anything about body shaming then actually you might be wrong to assume it, because another reason could be that maybe he was looking for the other way around - someone who (even if smaller) doesn't see him as big but rather thinks they can eat him for dinner instead. 😉

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slimp (0)

8/16/2022 5:37 AM

Back to the question, the answer is no. Rudeness isn't a requirement. Still, it happens. Some don't know any better. Others are sincere in the moment, then say to themselves, "OMG, what've I agreed to?" Then they disappear. Some "flirt" with no intention of following through. This place is like Alice's Restaurant, "you can get anything you want..." or don't want. Getting what you want may not be easy, but getting what you don't want, is.

One thing to keep in mind, others don't upset us. We upset ourselves in response to behaviors we don't like. We're most readily triggered by those we make assumptions about or project the most troubling, yet suppressed aspects of ourselves onto. Delusion and fragile egos become enraged when their identity is threatened. Being easily triggered provides evidence that some introspection is needed, and hopefully, it'll produce positive results.

This site is like a maze, with the dead ends being those who for whatever reason, can't be part of a successful interaction. You can get upset all you want, but a dead end wall or person probably doesn't give a shit. There's no point in digesting our emotions about it.

I make it clear right away that I'm not going to meet with anybody. I'm just here for messages and chat.

When it comes to meeting with others, looking at their track record may be helpful. Someone without a history should be the one do do the legwork, as they've yet to establish a basis of trust.

Rudeness will always be a part of a site like this. It actually makes successful connections that much more valuable, not unlike death adding value to life.

I understand the urge to vent over someone's rudeness, but if it goes on for too long, the rumination over toxic emotions causes more harm than good.

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AgentPoseidon (20)

8/14/2022 3:32 AM

I'm really glad to see this post. I am a direct respectful communicator until someone disrespects me and my time. And increasingly (to be fair not ONLY on this site, but yes it IS widespread on this site) I am sick and tired of dealing with the MAJORITY of males (can't really call them men) on this site who do one of more of the following:

- You send a direct polite interested message and get NOTHING (ghosting) after a whole week or more of waiting and you can see they logged on since. It doesn't matter what you say. Anything from a "hi" to a relevant compliment on something they put on their profile. A brief "no thank you" takes literally 2 seconds. By not responding to this they are implicitly saying the other human being who took an interest in them doesn't deserve a reply and that they are ABOVE everyone else and "too good to reply". No they aren't. They are just a self absorbed ass.

- You have an ongoing conversation and as soon as you start trying to arrange a real match they won't provide a phone number, won't text (even if you do/are, so their privacy is now more important than yours, for no reason) or won't agree to a date. They don't really want to meet (for whatever reason, they often won't tell you) they are just on the site to look for pics or get off. When they could look on any number of other sites for hot pics, no they feel the need to tease (meaning putting an ad as though they want matches when they DON'T) and mess with people and waste their time. Psychos! Go over to chatfighters or put you aren't currently wrestling on the profile here if you don't want to meet!

- You actually confirm a real match and time and they stand you up with no warning. Worse still you travel to their city and get stood up. Then they have a problem when you correctly flag them. (Talllermangrappler above in this thread is an example of this, standing up someone who visited his city to see him with no notice). I don't think there is any reason for anyone to make up a whole scenario and post it that they got stood up when they didn't. It's telling TMG outed himself (guilty conscience) when the author didn't even mention him by name.

This should go without saying: If you agree to a match SHOW UP, no canceling indirectly online when you know the other person is on their way or an hour before when you know they canceled other plans to meet you.

- You have a great match, they say it was a great match, then you never get a response from them again when you follow up, nor will they reciprocate a good recommendation or confirm you were a previous opponent. That is called GHOSTING. That's what immature insecure little manbitches do. MAN UP and say you're not interested in meeting again. Is that so hard? No, it's NOT okay to just say here that people should get the idea from silence and then leave you alone. Why do you have to poison the memory of a great experience for someone else by being a selfish ass? That's a CHOICE.

_______
All of this comes down to either being a mature responsible MAN who communicates and has respect for other people's time and energy, or again, being selfish little manbitches who want to play games and waste other's time and energy. If you wouldn't want to be treated that way WHY ARE YOU treating others that way?

Do I sound angry? I am. I resent the hundreds of hours of my wasted time and interest over the last 20 years dishonest disrespectful people and practices like the above have caused me, and no good reason for any of it, just selfish egos. It poisons and discourages my continued interest and passion for meeting other men to roll with and yes I'm sure it's responsible for hundreds of others leaving this and similar sites throughout the years. Yup, I'm leaning in and sounding off and calling it out.

I'm SERIOUS about wrestling. I only want REAL men to wrestle with, not someone described above. How about you?

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punch (7)

8/15/2022 9:28 PM

(In reply to this)

You really need to look in the mirror cos it's hella ironic how your comment shows YOU yourself as the rude, entitled and "self absorbed ass" instead:

1) Only egoistic twats expect that just because they themselves choose to spend their time initiating a message then others must waste their time responding. Anyone else with common sense knows that no reply is a reply in itself and REAL MEN just move on without getting their panties in a bunch like "insecure immature little manbitches". As a side note, for me I definitely ignore (messages from) people who clearly didn't even bother to read the points I specifically made the effort to mention in my profile.

2) Don't bloody assume - maybe they're not sure whether they want to meet precisely because the conversation isn't going as well as they hoped or expected.

3) You "don't think there is any reason for anyone to make up a whole scenario and post it that they got stood up when they didn't" - what are you, three years old? Do you know the meanings of the words "sabotage" and "revenge"? Unless you know one party well enough to trust more, don't blindly take any sides if you are a stranger to both.

4) "reciprocate a good recommendation" - duh again use your brains, what if you had a good time but they didn't quite (or at least in their opinion not enough for a recommendation)?

Seriously you whining like a girl is canceling out all your talk about manliness.

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AgentPoseidon (20)

8/16/2022 2:24 AM

(In reply to this)

If you want to fight with someone why don't you just ask for a damn match instead of running your mouth off fool?

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punch (7)

8/16/2022 2:45 AM

(In reply to this)

What's the point of editing/ changing your comment (again), hoping nobody would notice and so it would give others the false impression that you originally said something smart? Since you blocked my profile, you couldn't see that I'm only looking for punches not fights.

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punch (7)

8/16/2022 2:27 AM

(In reply to this)

You are a perfect example of why some people get ghosted.

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AgentPoseidon (20)

8/16/2022 2:35 AM

(In reply to this)

Good thing I ghosted your punk ass first huh?

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punch (7)

8/16/2022 2:38 AM

(In reply to this)

Duh, blocking ain't ghosting. And what's the point of blocking if you're still going to respond?

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AgentPoseidon (20)

8/16/2022 2:54 AM

(In reply to this)

He really didn't like that cockblock did he lol. Stop bragging about ghosting and start demonstrating it. Sometime today would be great...

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punch (7)

8/16/2022 3:08 AM

(In reply to this)

You sure are extremely dim for someone who writes poems (maybe that's why they're lousy lol!)... Let me make this easier for your pea brain:

Firstly your blocking does absolutely nothing to me - blocking only makes sense if you don't intend to engage further. Secondly what you did was blocking not ghosting, which is what YOU bragged about having done to my "punk ass" when you actually didn't. Thirdly what I was saying is that you should stop whining about getting ghosted and reflect on your crappy attitude which is why people ghost you (I neither ghost nor do I get ghosted by others).

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AgentPoseidon (20)

8/16/2022 3:41 AM

(In reply to this)

I don't care what you're saying.

I also don't expect you to understand poetry. It requires having a soul, as opposed to being a troll. Tearing down / insulting other people's creations just because you got triggered by and disagree with a discussion post doesn't make you a man, it makes you a coward. I write about my experiences and passions, and no matter what you say here, they were and are real, you can never take that away from me or others no matter how hard you try.

I wrote above about real about things people do that make this environment worse not just for me, but for most of us. I had a right to post about that. You seem to thrive on rudeness, incivility, and ego. Hope you figure that out one day - on your own time not mine.

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punch (7)

8/16/2022 4:05 AM

(In reply to this)

Yeah right, you "don't care what I'm saying" so much that you're triggered to keep responding at length.

It's precisely because I'm good at poetry that I know yours suck. Also go learn the meaning/ definition of troll - I was addressing your points in proper detail. You have a terrible habit of projecting yourself on others (as already mentioned much earlier about you being the rude, self absorbed, insecure immature little manbitch instead). I'm not the one trying so desperately to talk about and act like a "real man" and shit, who then resorts to blocking like a coward.

As much as you had the right to make that rude and egoistic angry post, I too have the right to comment (which by the way I received a message from another person saying it was good that I called out your whining tantrum).

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AgentPoseidon (20)

8/16/2022 5:40 AM

(In reply to this)

You are the definition of a troll. And you hate me so much because you are the worst part and essence of everything I wrote about. The truth hurts doesnt it?

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punch (7)

8/16/2022 5:50 AM

(In reply to this)

That's it? Just a stubborn insistence to stick on a label? And what worst what truth, I don't even ghost or do half of the stuff you wrote about. Now you just sound disturbed. Look, I don't even hate you at all, I just found your tirade of a rant annoying that's all.

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AgentPoseidon (20)

8/16/2022 5:53 AM

(In reply to this)

You are the essence of psychopathic hate. Just look at everything you wrote. Why do you think you were blocked? This shit right here.

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punch (7)

8/16/2022 6:06 AM

(In reply to this)

Everything I wrote is to address what you wrote, so I don't know what you're getting at. And again, I'm not even sure what you were hoping to accomplish by blocking but well if it makes you feel better.

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AgentPoseidon (20)

8/16/2022 6:15 AM

(In reply to this)

To answer the question of this post, yes punch must be rude. Its like an addiction he has.

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AgentPoseidon (20)

8/16/2022 2:23 AM

(In reply to this)

Whatever! Who asked you?

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punch (7)

8/16/2022 2:29 AM

(In reply to this)

So you edited/ changed your comment from a bitchslap to a sissy "whatever"? Lol!

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AgentPoseidon (20)

8/14/2022 3:43 AM

(In reply to this)

Oh and one more thing. Those of you who can't host while I do understand that, if you are trying to set up things with other people from out of town, spring for a room. You shouldn't expect someone paying travel expenses to also pay for lodging in YOUR city.

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BJJWrestlerLasVegas (9)

23 days ago

(In reply to this)

There is object in paying for a place to wrestle if the other individual is paying to travel. However, each persons financial situation is different and may be able to afford what others cannot afford, whether they are the traveler or the visitor. When I hosted visitors from Lithuania the summer before Covid I gladly covered their fees at the dojo as it was the right thing to do, despite being in precarious financial straights myself. Though the dojo gave me 50% off for them knowing my situation it was still the right thing to do. If u are financially unable to cover a place perhaps cover their bus fare (a day pass in Las Vegas is a big $5, half that for seniors and disabled) and this way you also help them visit the city as the pass is good for 24' (14 routes in Las Vegas run 24/7) and when they get on the air conditioned comfortable bus they will probably think of you for providing for their transportation. Of course there are times when you plan to meet and something comes up, just let them know. I had to call off meets from 7/16 to 8/2 due a breakthru Covid infection and of course I let them know. There can be many reasons that you can not meet up, just reply to the person's email and hopefully that is not asking too much.

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john el (14)

8/17/2022 7:48 PM

(In reply to this)

Sure if they came to see me specifically.
But if already here, and we're trying to connect for a match, why is it incumbent on me to get a room? One, they probably already HAVE a room due to travel. 2, if THEY want the match and initiated the discussion they should have a plan in mind.
Typically it would be discussed and a room maybe split, but this total generalization is just a no.

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slimp (0)

5/03/2022 5:08 AM

I've had a lot of one word messages. I usually check the profile, and ignore those that are virtually blank. The one word message suggests, "I don't think you're really worth my time and consideration, but I'll toss you a crumb anyway." I check the profile, to see if there's any potentially compatible interests. I don't remember any one word messengers who had anything worthwhile compatible with me.

Regarding rudeness, if it's part of role playing, I love it. Otherwise, respect is the priority.

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TakeThePunchesAI (7)

5/02/2022 6:37 PM

I don't know guys, this is a more complex conversation. Like yes, maybe some is being rude for not responding or for blocking, ect. But, we don't know what that person went through to give you that response. Could have had a bad experience and jaded their mind you know? You have to look at both sides of it. And then on the victims end, yes it might hurt that someone is rude. But why is that bothering you so much? Because that could jade your mind and next thing you know, you're doing that same thing to somebody else.

Personally, I try to be friendly to everybody, try to treat people the way I want to be treated. Now I'm not asking for anybodies pity, I just want to open our mind to different perspective. I am one of those guys that gets a compliment/match inquiry or two everyday or every other day. Most of them I'm not interested in cause I'm very specific about my fun and stuff. But out of respect and the fact that I'm a social person, I still interact and I respectfully decline and leave the door open for a potential future. On my end, I don't want anybody to think I'm rude, arrogant, or some douche because of my appearance you know? So I am more concerned about coming off rude to somebody than somebody being rude to me. I come from a certain place, I suppose you could say I'm conditioned to people being rude. But I definitely don't want to add to that list.

I like this topic, Nofabio. Hope all is well and that it's better for you on here since this post.

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AgentPoseidon (20)

8/14/2022 3:55 AM

(In reply to this)

Let's stop excusing the rude people please? As you say "out of respect you still interact and respectfully decline". They should too.
We have become conditioned to people being rude because we accepted it too often earlier in our collective journey now rudeness rules
our society. Accepting it to the point it becomes the norm and civility is a rare exception is part of the problem. Thanks!

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JOKING (27)

4/25/2022 3:56 AM

So glad to discuss all the situations that occur. With so many diverse personalities anything can be expected both positive and negative.

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tallgermangrappler (97 )

8/12/2022 10:55 PM

(In reply to this)

How about YOU harassing me with a negative flag for a “no show” with no reason.
We never agreed to meet! I told you numerous times that I was not interested. Flagging me for that is not okay!

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JOKING (27)

8/12/2022 11:14 PM

(In reply to this)

U must have forgotten no it wasn't recently should have flagged u when it happened i waited far too long. U invited me to meet in the city where u left me outside. And never showed up. Remember? You became ill when i got there NOT before I travelled all the way out there to meet you.you have clearly forgotten about it cause u never tried to make it up to me or anything. I believe you really did forget cause you surely went on happily like it never happened.

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tallgermangrappler (97 )

8/13/2022 2:56 AM

(In reply to this)

Sorry man, this never did happen in my recollection. I’m just not interested in meeting. Putting a revenge flag on my profile is not a decent thing to do. And is definitely not in love with your comments on this blog.

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AgentPoseidon (20)

8/14/2022 3:58 AM

(In reply to this)

Sure that's what you say now...whatevs! Standing someone up who took the trouble to travel to your city to see you? Completely unacceptable. Think of how he felt returning all the way back home. A decent opponent would have offered to cover half his cost there / back when canceling. The flag exists exactly for people like you. It's people like you that made it so I will not base any of my travel plans on wrestling matches. Yup. People just like you. JOKING didn't even call you out by name, that was a totally generic innocuous nice post. it was your guilty conscience that had you speak up.

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tallgermangrappler (97 )

8/14/2022 7:46 PM

(In reply to this)

You have no knowledge of this situation!
Whatever JOKiNG described never happened!

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AgentPoseidon (20)

8/14/2022 11:10 PM

(In reply to this)

Why would anyone make that up?

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JerseyLuchador (10 )

4/21/2022 12:14 PM

I had a very handsome friend who was part of the Gay Wrestling community. He would do the rudest meetups that I didn’t agree with. He would tell the other guy he would meet them somewhere then asked them how he would identify them. If he didn’t like what he saw he would just walk by them. This was the days when men use to contact each other off of lists.

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tuffgrappler58 (16 )

4/22/2022 2:16 AM

(In reply to this)

This guy sounds like a total asshole. Unfortunately, they are prevalent out there.

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BamaJDon41 (7 )

4/19/2022 9:25 PM

Only time I ever get rude is when I'm responding to rude people. Otherwise those people just walk all over you.

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BigMG (1 )

4/19/2022 1:52 PM

someone was really rude to me throughout all our messages - then we met and he was even ruder - turned out that it was all part of his role playing - he was really nice after the match

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tuffgrappler58 (16 )

4/19/2022 1:54 PM

(In reply to this)

Sounds like he either had issues or was a gay porn wrestler. Or both.

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BigMG (1 )

4/21/2022 11:07 AM

(In reply to this)

No, just a policeman who had a fetish about building up to a match in his particular way

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Devgrapple (3)

4/19/2022 9:10 AM

Hey mdcolumbiaguy, the UK is full of rude people! It's not just you, I usually get ignored but sometimes abuse for saying hello. I just laugh at them

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cookie0 (0)

4/19/2022 11:59 AM

(In reply to this)

Hi, Sometimes yes, especially from either a lot younger or gym bunnies , who really only want to post pictures of their bodies.

Yes agree getting ignored , I also find both quite rude, regardless what others say and tell you just to move on. But it is the UK, we are used to people saying no thank you or being polite.

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Danny Boy 83 (1)

6/26/2020 9:56 AM

I’m always polite if someone says hello, sometimes I do forget to reply or phone them back

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BigJobberStewie (0)

5/12/2020 8:15 PM

One user told me to take my shirt off and video chat right now. I politely said no thank you. He told me to fuck off.

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stesmith20000 (0)

6/29/2020 11:49 PM

(In reply to this)

I think I have an idea who you’re talking about.

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technics2 (71 )

5/12/2020 9:07 PM

(In reply to this)

@BigJobberStewie. I laugh at people like that and keep it moving. Lonely and feeling entitled. Kinda sad.😢

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BigJobberStewie (0)

5/12/2020 9:14 PM

(In reply to this)

I was shocked. I thought I was polite when I sad no thank you. I know to not let it get to me

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grappling hooked (31)

4/19/2020 8:51 PM

Actually, I find ignoring a friendly introductory message from a fellow member to also be incredibly rude. If someone at a party said "hello" to you, would you just walk away and ignore them?

I used to get upset about it; now I just give them a week or two to reply, and if they don't, then I block them. That way they're off my radar and I can forget about them, and I also won't accidentally "bother" them again.

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BJJWrestlerLasVegas (9)

8/14/2022 10:54 AM

(In reply to this)

This is not unusual. For the week of August 7 that just ended I sent out 6 inquiries and not even a single one answered, not even those shown as closest to me under members. My renewal for donations comes up within a few days. Why bother?

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Juggernaut (0)

6/30/2020 1:21 AM

(In reply to this)

An in-person introduction and one made online are not the same. Try asking a question or making a comment. That way you give the person something meaningful to respond to, while bypassing the one word back and forth since your "introduction" is already included.

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grappling hooked (31)

6/30/2020 5:16 AM

(In reply to this)

I don't just say "Hello". I say welcome to the site, good to see another local here, etc. and if I'm feeling forward, I might ask them what they think of my profile.

If someone ignores that kind of friendly greeting, to me that's rude.

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JasonAnders (169)

5/30/2020 4:53 AM

(In reply to this)

They dont know what they are missing 😁

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grappling hooked (31)

6/30/2020 5:17 AM

(In reply to this)

Thanks, Jason! :-D

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technics2 (71 )

5/12/2020 7:11 PM

(In reply to this)

I reply to all messages. However, i find it annoying when someone sends a "Hello" or some other greeting with no text. I will reply back with the same. Then some will send another greeting with no text. OK you reached out and have my attention. Please speak your mind or ask a question. If you reach out the ball
Is in your court to go father than a simple "Hey".

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Juggernaut (0)

5/30/2020 7:52 AM

(In reply to this)

This is true. Consider, communication online is not the same as communicating face to face. Its ok to start with a salutation but support it with some text. Once you engage someone, either ask a question or make a comment.

One way to avoid any unnecessary comments and contacts is to be as precise with your greeting/profile as you can. I realize nobody wants to be insulting but there's nothing wrong with saying under 30, athletic build, or over 6'. That way if someone messages you that doesn't fit, just say see profile.

The hard part is when people don't write anything and give you nothing to go on. In those case, I can either check their "favorites" or just move on.

I will say that sometimes I message others to give them compliment because I get them (everybody likes a compliment...right?). In those cases, nothing is expected, but a "you're welcome" would be nice.

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ChiFight (6 )

5/20/2020 3:11 AM

(In reply to this)

I totally agree. There. I get that all the time. Guys who just say hi, ask how I'm doing, then dead silence and they act like it's my job to lead the conversation.

It's like, hey... you messaged me. Not the other way around. Were you just that interested in how I was doing, or is there a point?

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Juggernaut (0)

5/30/2020 8:02 AM

(In reply to this)

The point is you put your feelings on the line while mine remain protected. That way any peculiarities always looks like your idea and I get to stay neutral and don't feel inferior, out of place, or rejected. Clever, don't you think? I call this the reverse "challenge".

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nofabio (11)

4/20/2020 1:31 PM

(In reply to this)

Sound logic & action; I'll follow your lead, buddy!

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Juggernaut (0)

4/19/2020 1:09 AM

This was the first and only communication asked to the members.

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JerseyLuchador (10 )

4/15/2020 5:44 PM

As someone that’s been in this for awhile. I’ll tell you that you have to grow thick skin when you’re in the gay wrestling community. There are quite a few men in the community that don’t know the words “no thank you”. I had one wrestling friend awhile back that would set up a meeting, and if he didn’t like what you looked like he would walk right by them. The best thing that you can do is not take it personal. A lot of men have their own problems and insecurities. Trust me you want to wrestle men that are HOT inside and out. Just move on the the men who really want to wrestle, and not pose, flex, and have yo admire them. And, appreciate the men that respond back to you with; no thank you, I’m not interested, your not what I’m looking for, and the rest. These men are being honest with you. They are not wasting your time. They are not keeping you in suspense. In return you be kind with men you’re not interested in. Happy Wrestling!

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Vinny (6)

5/12/2020 2:36 AM

(In reply to this)

Oh sorry, I don’t belong here.
You see I’m straight. Shall I remove my profile?

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AgentPoseidon (20)

8/14/2022 2:43 AM

(In reply to this)

Hey Vinny!

There was absolutely NOTHING in his nice post against straight men wrestling or being on this site. YOU made it about that. He was writing about HIS experience.

Have you talked to a therapist lately? Gay men wrestling or even talking about wrestling seems to trigger you.

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fightdude (0)

5/17/2020 2:27 AM

(In reply to this)

stay here many are straight also

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Juggernaut (0)

4/19/2020 10:15 PM

(In reply to this)

Before I go any further, I think that we should all first recognize that this site is available to people from all over the world. So that behavior or expectations that might be perfectly normal for one country or group, might not be appreciate or expected for another. There are even cultures within cultures that have dramatically different behavior and expectations.

Second, a lot of the way other respond depends on the contents of the introduction. For instance, some people go overboard by making a statement but never really asking a question. While others don't say enough. Take for example someone who just says Hi. How do you respond to that? By saying hi back? OK, but what was accomplished here?

In the case of the former, someone writes a statement but never ask a question. Then message you back saying, why did you not respond? While I'm on the subject of too short of a statement, “challenges.” How do you respond to those, by saying yes, no, OK?

Anyway, I sometimes send compliments to others that have something I admire (e.g., a clear and easy to read profile) but nothing to do with challenge interest. In those cases, nothing is expected by me in return, except maybe "you're welcome." Which I get about 50% of the time. The other 50% I wouldn't call them rude, except maybe not so polite. I would hope that there's no one who doesn't like a compliment, as long as its not inappropriate.

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FantasyHeel (1)

6/23/2020 1:57 AM

(In reply to this)

Well said. I most often will reply to an honest salutation but if “not the right fit”, I’ll respectfully decline but than them anyway. The exchange usually ends with them saying thanks for the reply.

For the single worded “hi” or “hey there”, I often don’t engage because as you said, are we going to play the single message back and forth game and end up no where?

Now,I’m also like other people and I’m very busy at times and yes, do neglect to properly reply to legitimate messages from time to time and very seldom. That is no excuse but still, I guess I’m just a human? :-)

Happy meet ups everyone!

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nofabio (11)

4/20/2020 1:33 PM

(In reply to this)

Thin line between rude & "not so polite"

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Juggernaut (0)

5/12/2020 8:20 AM

(In reply to this)

Some times it can be a chasm between the two. Rude is personal. Not polite on the other hand, is general and a matter of perspective, culture, or expectations.

Here's a story that might help:
Person A sneezes in front of Person B without covering their mouth. Person B tells Person A to "cover your mouth when you sneeze!" Rather than apologize, Person A responds with, "you don't have to be so rude". Who was rude in this scenario, Person A or Person B?

If you say both then they cancel each other out and there is no topic.

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Lumberjack (43 )

4/19/2020 3:49 PM

(In reply to this)

Wise words Sir.

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nofabio (11)

4/16/2020 12:20 AM

(In reply to this)

Yeah, I have a thick skin; but there is no excuse for being a prick! Our social-media age breeds rudeness & dis-courtesy! Do I sound like an old crank? ;)

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JerseyLuchador (10 )

4/16/2020 6:29 PM

(In reply to this)

No you sound like a good man that's been burned too many times. Most of us here to have fun. When you let small minded men who probably don't wrestle anyway upset you you're giving them what they want. They want to feel superior. Don't let them get to you!

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nofabio (11)

4/17/2020 1:18 AM

(In reply to this)

Yeah, you're right - but I still wanna piledrive them so hard I'll have to pin them in the basement! ;) Thanks for the kind words & common sense, buddy!

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JayPuncher (13)

4/14/2020 1:12 AM

I had one guy (who was no "adonis" himself) write back and tell me I'm too fat to fight. I wrote back with "LOL - thank you Mr Tact"
Some people just have no manners or etiquette online.

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nofabio (11)

4/14/2020 3:58 PM

(In reply to this)

Sounds like if he were anymore of a dick he'd spit sperm! But what goes around; they'll be our age someday too, right? ;) Thanks for the reply, buddy- & keep punchin'!

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nofabio (11)

4/08/2020 4:10 AM

This is for all you jerks on here who, when getting an introductory message from a fellow member, instead of just not answering or responding with a "not interested" reply, which this sites makes simple to do, will block the sender immediately. Get over yourself- & learn to take a compliment from whom you must consider a lesser being. Being an asshole is never cool! End of lecture.

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mdcolumbiaguy (0)

4/19/2022 12:40 AM

(In reply to this)

I had a guy from the UK message me the other day and say how much he would like to fight me when he's back in the States. I can't even remember the details of his profile, but I replied that he would need some gear, to which he said he had some trunks, jocks, etc.

I replied by saying "all good for pulling off" in good fun, and he turned around and said "FFFFFF You. I didn't say anything about you wanting to pull anything off of me. F off!" and then blocked me.

Nutcase. You wrestle around in jocks and underwear and have pics of yourself in it, but then turn around and do something like that. Nutcase.

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tuffgrappler58 (16 )

4/19/2022 2:50 AM

(In reply to this)

I agree. Welcome to the world of "flakes and fakes," as one commenter put it.

Some of these guys have more issues than the National Enquirer. Dr. Phil would have a field day on this site!

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Juggernaut (0)

4/19/2020 12:19 AM

(In reply to this)

I've got a very think skin, so I feel sorry for people like this.

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nofabio (11)

4/20/2020 1:34 PM

(In reply to this)

You needn't feel sorry for me, just because I call things as I see them

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Juggernaut (0)

4/20/2020 7:32 PM

(In reply to this)

Actually, I wasn't referring to you; rather, agreeing with your sentiment.

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nofabio (11)

4/21/2020 12:46 AM

(In reply to this)

Sorry; I misunderstood your comment! So when do WE wrestle? ;)

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