The Art of the Selfie

Sturdy (31)

1/27/2014 12:56 AM

1 - Stand CLOSE to the mirror - It's no good taking a photo of your reflection in a mirror if that mirror is nine feet away on the other side of the room, and the resulting photo is 90% magnolia wallpaper, beige carpet, and your pet Persian licking its private parts in the corner.

2 - Lighten Up! - If your manly physique is shrouded in darkness it's just an arty shadow. If your camera has a flash, use it. Or, you know, turn the light on. You might think you look all enigmatic and exciting but you ain't kidding no-one. We know you're just trying to hide your love-handles in the flattering gloom.

3 - Don't be a flasher - If you are using the flash, hold the camera away from your body/face. Otherwise it looks like a UFO has materialised out of your left nipple. Not a good look.

4 - Don't dangle the angle - If you're not using a mirror, at least try to hold the camera at a good angle. The human body can look VERY strange from certain viewpoints. Try to get it pointing straight at you, roughly eye-level. A worm's eye view of your manly pecs is not very alluring.

5 - Dress appropriately - The picture needs to show your UPPER body. If you are wearing nothing but your Primark Y-Fronts we REALLY don't want to see them. REALLY. Hold the camera a bit higher up so we can just see you from belly-button upwards.

Failing all of the above, how about getting a mate to take the picture for you? It works wonders!

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